Craig was pretty excited about his Whole Foods deli purchase. We brought it all home (going to Whole Foods is like a pilgramage – it’s forever away and only done on occasion when we’re feeling rich) and I heated up the roast. We started to eat, and Craig wondered out loud if it was cooked through when purchased, or if we should have cooked it more than the quick nuclear reheat. I asked him if he was sure this was meat.
Of course it was meat! It was “field roast”. What could roast be, besides meat? Probably meat which lived in a field. What kind of meat didn’t matter, it had looked good in the deli window.
I dug out the wrapper. Field roast. See for yourself: http://www.fieldroast.com/index.htm
And we laughed. Well, I laughed. Craig plotted his revenge, musing over whom might be the most likely victim for a mock-meat trick. So watch out, all you carnivores, when you dine with us. Consider yourself warned.